It’s a strange thing to be visibly tattooed in a world that isn’t. Looking back I never would’ve imagined myself as a tattooed person. Somewhere along the line, I fell in love with the idea of putting pretty things permanently on my body and now, ten years later, I find myself with quite an assortment of colorful pieces. Some of them have meanings, some don’t..
I thought about it before I took the plunge and tattooed my knuckles, ribs, chest, arms and later my legs. I’m an over-thinker by nature, I knew the kind of reactions I would get from strangers. I knew that some people just wouldn’t get it and would judge me right off the bat solely based on my appearance. There seemed to be an imaginary line of “too many”, at least where I’m from, and if you crossed that line, it confused people. Why on earth would you do that? What are you going to do when you’re 80? Small tattoos – back tattoos, ankles, maybe even a cute saying on your wrist – all “normal” in the eyes of most people surrounding me. But go beyond that and you entered the world of ”out there.”
The most surprising thing about being tattooed is how it affects my day to day. I live in a pretty small, somewhat..sometimes conservative town and there are often times I just want to hide. Most of the time, I don’t feel like making small talk (oh my, you’re quite a colorful young lady), getting looks (either positive and negative) or answering questions (did that hurt? how much did that cost? can I see them all?). I just want to do my thing hassle-free – shop, hang out, etc., so I dress accordingly.
I think it’s safe to say that I’ve developed a tougher skin somewhere along the line. I think you have to when you have people making comments about your appearance or invading your personal space on the regular. It doesn’t bother me much these days, although that’s not to say my feelings don’t get hurt now and again. I can be sensitive, which probably isn’t the best personality type to have when you go against the grain, but over the years I’ve developed a light-hearted attitude towards it all and now most negative remarks slide right past me.
Maybe I’ve come to a point where I think of my tattoos as doing a favor for me. They’ve become almost a filter in a way. They keep me real and when it comes down to it, it allows me to see other people for who they are too. I will never understand how something on my body as simple as two roses or birds over my shoulders could offend anyone to the point of needing or wanting to make a rude comment, but that’s the difference between them and me, I suppose. In my world, life is too short to involve myself with anyone who doesn’t have an accepting heart and if my tattoos bother you to the point of sticking your nose up in the air at me, then I’d prefer if you just keep on walking by. As I see it, I didn’t want to know you anyway.
But on the other hand, there’s a part of me that needs to work on overcoming my own judgment of people. Because I’ve experienced some of the rudest stares and remarks, I’ve begun to expect it from all people. If I’m at the store and notice a woman staring at my arm, my first reaction is to stare right back, maybe even give her a “what?!” kind of look. I think over the years I developed a chip on my shoulder, which isn’t a good thing. I’m aware of it now, but for awhile I would forget that more often than not people are simply curious, or maybe they like what they see. In a way my attitude towards all of the un-tattooed people of the world is just as rude. I’m judging them for possibly judging me, making an assumption that may or may not even be true.
Many people won’t get why I have chosen to decorate my skin with pictures, words and beautiful colors but the older I get, the less I care. That’s on them and we are all entitled to our own opinion. There hasn’t been a day where I haven’t loved how I look, but there have been days where I’ve been in situations where I’ve felt beyond irritated at peoples’ reactions.
What it comes down to is that it’s my choice to let anyone’s negativity affect me. No matter what choice you make there will always be someone out there who disapproves. You just have to focus on what makes you happy and let everything else fall to the side. I’m grateful that my tattoos have helped me learned this huge life lesson. So I just do my thing and secretly smile to myself every time someone asks me what I’ll do when I’m 80 years old. Because really, don’t they know that we’re all going to be wrinkly and old? And at least my wrinkles will be colorful.
<3
xoxo
